


Sparkle?!

by AshynnaStarlight



Series: Day to Day Life at Hogwarts [13]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Buffy the Vampire Slayer References, Gen, Joking Between Friends, Lestat - Freeform, Vampires, dada, mentioning of Lestat, mentioning of Twilight, slight Twilight criticism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-29
Updated: 2014-12-29
Packaged: 2018-03-04 04:56:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 670
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2953145
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AshynnaStarlight/pseuds/AshynnaStarlight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Drabble based on the headcanon submitted by thewatchingwillow to the mugglebornheadcanon blog. The DADA professor in 2007 faced an perplexing surge of questions about vampires. “Professor, can we meet one?” “Do they really sparkle?” “Can you tell us how to kill them? I want to send my little sister a list.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sparkle?!

“Welcome class, Today we will be discussing vampires; one of the magical beings known to both the wizarding and muggle community,” I spoke calmly, nothing curiously that the students were particularity buzzing with excitement. They tended to be more curious about this topic, and werewolves, as most were half-bloods or muggleborn so they were the creatures they had grown up with. However, they seem to be more excited than usual.

               One of the female muggleborns’ hands shot up, she was practically vibrating in her chair. “Yes, Miss Cotton?’

               “Do they sparkle in sunlight?” I just stared at the Hufflepuffer, my mind trying to process her odd question. If I was not mistaken, she had just asked me if they _sparkled_. I could hear the boys and some other girls groan in despair.

               “Sparkle?”

               “Yes! And is their flesh as hard as marble?” The Gryffindor Reynolds asked excitedly, her eyes bright.

                “Are their eyes red when they drink human blood and topaz when they drink animal blood?”

               “Do some have special abilities like fore-sight and mind reading?”

               “Hold it!” I ordered, raising my hands to stop the onslaught of questions. “Where did you get these assumptions about vampires from”?  I had never heard these kind of questions before.

               “Twilight,” Gregory drawled with a disgusted face, earning glares from some of his female and male peers.

               “Twilight?” The girls quickly explained to me this recently released book which had sparkly marble-skinned vampires. They seemed so smitten over some bloke called Edward as they swiftly asked me if I knew a vampire by that name or any at all.

               “No, I don’t know a vampire called Edward Cullen. No, vampires do _not_ sparkle or have a skin akin to marble. Yes, I have met a few vampires, and I’m sure they would raise their eyebrows when they hear this newest description.

               “How can you kill a vampire?” Lyon asked me curious as other students looked crestfallen. “My sister sees herself as the next Buffy the Vampire Slayer so I wanted to make a list for her.”

               “I will discuss various ways to protect yourself against a hostile vampire but hunting and killing vampires is prohibited by law according to Paragraph Twelve of the Guideline of the Treatment of Non-Wizard Part-Human. So tell your sister, that it is best for her to start looking for a different future career!”

               I tried to continue with the class, getting the ‘occasional’ odd question born from muggleborn television series and books. Each year it surprised me what was thought up by writers and such. Some were actually pretty close to the truth, for example the Vampire Lestat – who was real – others were plain bizarre like this Twilight series. It seems I had some new reading to do.

 

“I want to bleach my eyes and erase part of my memory!” I complained to my friend Fox, the Potions Professor, while we had a late-night drink in the Staff Room.

               “Why?” he asked amused as he sipped his fire whiskey, lounging back in his big armchair. I smiled knowingly as I saw him glance from time to time to the lovely Rena, who was our temperamental and strict Transfiguration colleague.  Those two were just hilarious.

               “The things people call fiction. Honestly, I could give you a whole rant about the flaws and misconceptions in this book! I’ve read so many good stories from non-published writers and they decide to publish this….”

               “Calm down, Finn. I know you can give me a rant that would impress Hermione Granger, but it is Friday evening. Leave the heavy discussions about literature for Monday or so.” I glared at Fox who just smiled at me.

               It seems that the coming years I will be plagued with questions about this series…I just hoped that they wouldn’t do anything stupid. I sighed as I sipped my whiskey. Oh the joys of being the DADA Professor. I suddenly smirked at Fox whose expression immediately turned suspicious.

               “So….how are the cooking lessons going….Professor Ramsay?”

**Author's Note:**

> Twilight was published at 2005. Tweaked it a bit so to keep the headcanon 'accurate'. Just think that vampires aren't discussed in like 3rd year or that the year they mention it is 2005 *shrugs*. I don't owe any of the works mentioned. I do owe my OCs and the way I shaped the headcanon.


End file.
